Things I’ve Learned
This painting was inspired by a weekend retreat I went on with my daughter. I had been keen to try plant medicines and was thrilled to experience this life changing event with her.
The painting, At the Head of the Waterfall, shows one of the gorgeous views from the Theosophical Centre where the retreat took place, surrounded by cultivated gardens and wild nature.
My experience with the plant medicine was not what I hoped. I think the vast majority of people have a deeply life-changing experience. I felt like I drank poison. I tried a couple of times but was just left wondering why I was deliberately making myself sick. That’s not to say I didn’t learn anything. Just having the experience can teach you that perhaps that’s not the way for you to move forward.
All that is to say that you can never know in advance what you’re going to learn from an experience.
I sent out a survey a few weeks back and, although I didn’t really know what I would learn from it, it was great to get the feedback, so thanks to everyone that replied.
One of the surprising things was that people weren’t just interested in my successes as an artist - in fact, not one person said that’s all they wanted to hear about. Most people wanted to hear more about the struggles - a balance of both the highs and lows.
I have to admit that, although it’s always been my intention to communicate the struggles of being an artist, it does put me in a vulnerable place. Who wants to admit that it’s pretty hard sometimes, that you don’t always get the feedback or validation or prizes or sales that you would love?
I don’t think I’m alone as an artist in doubting myself. But when it happens, you do feel very alone. Picking yourself back up, dealing with disappointments and setbacks, validating yourself, encouraging yourself, persisting - they’re all things that you have to learn, not only in art, but in life.
If you’d like to do the survey, you can access it here